So you've done the bit of your relationship where you can't spend a moment without each other. Now you're up to the living happily ever after bit. Only, in odd moments you realise you're not totally happy.

Actually, sometimes you're outright lonely. But you don't want to think about that, because what if it means you've got the wrong partner?

Somewhere between the romance and the kids, the mortgage and earning a living you've got this nagging sense that something is missing.

Chances are, you're right. Something is missing. And it's quite possibly friendship. It's the easiest thing in the world to lose touch with your friends when you develop a serious relationship.

Partners often take on big projects together, like having children or buying a house. Things that absorb time and attention, leaving little left over for your friends. And if your friends aren't that interested in teething, or paint charts you may find you start to struggle for conversation.

So the friendships tend to fade away, and after a while it feels awkward to get in touch because you haven't seen each other in so long.

However, sooner or later you'll start to crave connections outside your primary relationships. You'll want to have your own interests, and your own friends. It doesn't mean your relationship is doomed. It just means you want to live a full life, being a partner, and being a person in your own right as well.

Trying to broaden your life back out again is not necessarily easy. How do you warm up those old friendships you let go? Are those old friends sore at you? Do they feel let down, or will they welcome you back? And if you do make contact, will you have anything in common anymore?

One thing is certain. If you don't approach your old friends, you won't get the chance to try again. Maybe some of them won't be that keen, and that's understandable if they feel you drifted away from them. Give them an opportunity to get used to the idea. They may come round in time.

It's very likely that some of your old friends will be pleased to make contact again. Your lives may have changed, but many of the things you enjoyed about each others company will still be there.

You may find you need to look for new friends as well. It can feel a bit vulnerable and awkward doing this. It can feel like there is something wrong with you because you don't already have lots of friends, or because you want friends as well as your partner.

But making new friends is something everyone needs to do sometime. When you develop new aspects of your life, you tend to want friends that reflect that. Sometimes the people you are interested in being friends with don't have room for another friend. It doesn't mean you aren't worth being friends with.

You'll probably have to take some risks, but good friends are worth a bit of a risk.